Everyone always talks about “living their best life”, “living in the moment”, “yolo”, but what does that even mean? When you read that in social media posts you might find yourself sad, and in a comparison, questioning the quality of your life. Why is everyone else so happy but me? Why is everyone else’s life so perfect but mine? It’s so easy to get swallowed into a spiralling bottomless pit of questions why everyone else’s grass is greener than yours. Reality check, none of it is true! It’s all perspective!
The beauty and the curse of social media is that you can share only what you want, but you’re also only receiving part of the truth. People often only share wins and successes but seldom show you the ugly struggles and failures it took to get there. People also don’t share if they had to trample over people to get somewhere, compromise their values and standards, etc. Every win has a story, and it’s important to see its context. I often wish I could take my own advice. It’s so hard to stay objective in situations that we can be emotionally triggered by, but trust me, the more I commit to wanting to see truth, the most liberated I feel with new revelations.
I was raised to be an honest woman. As an artist in the music industry, strong values are at my core which have greatly influenced my decisions. Turning down “opportunities” that seemed like they could help me move up, but would greatly compromise my foundation, was difficult but necessary. This lead me to question, what is success really if I have to live with guilt and regret? What is success if I need to hide behind accolades to make myself feel better about betraying myself and lying to the listeners I make music for? What is success if I’ve never figured out my purpose?
An integral part of our happiness, physical/mental health, and sense of fulfillment is being honest with ourselves and defining what success is to us in all areas of our life. Defining what’s truly important, what gets us out of bed each morning to face the uphill battles, what is our “raison d’être” and contribution to this world. As cheesy as it may seem, ask yourself if the choices you make, both big and small, are making the world better because you’re alive. Changing the world starts with changing the immediate “world” around you, and brightening the light within you.
I created a vision board for myself with pictures and words of things I want to experience, achieve, share, etc. I do the best I can every day to inch closer to these. Wins are also in the everyday tasks (like cooking, laundry, providing for your family…) as much as the big conquerings. While I haven’t yet reached levels I’d like, I’m realizing that my success started in the small choices I’ve made along the way to be true to myself, my values, respect my vision of the kind of life I want to live, and the legacy I want to leave behind.
Many of us get so caught up with the fallacies we see in images and headlines in the media that we get distracted from the fact that maybe we’ve been winning all along. Maybe where we are in life is exactly where we need to be? Maybe the down time is life giving us chances, time and time again to redefine our future? Maybe it’s during the slow seasons we are to reflect and ask ourselves tough questions like “Am I Truly Happy?” and make the commitment to “Today I’m changing my life”. Everyday is really a second chance to sculpt masterpieces of ourselves starting with a little honesty.